Boom Kinetic, formed in 2006, is a high-energy pop-rock band featuring:

• Wiley Seeger
• Zach Gump
• Aaron Schauer
• Greg Guillot
• Miguel Gamboa

Wiley Seeger

Forged in the firey belly of Mt. Vesuvius and crafted on the anvil of Zeus with eyes of dark crimson ruby and vocal cords made of angel’s hair, Wiley Seeger marches the earth day and night looking for the next face to melt. Boom Kinetic’s lead singer says the band operates based on one theory, “You rock it! You party, you dance; and when you’re done, you rock it even more.” He adds, “Lasers and fog are a must.” As legendary as Seeger is now, his beginnings are actually humble. He was born a poor West Virginia coal miner’s daughter in 1977. His father put her to work at the age of three running loads to the surface without a mule and quickly made a man out him. Seeger spent every day of his life until turning 22 mining coal with only one-half meal at brunch time and a potato for a midnight snack, “My only comfort in life came when, at the age of 5, I found a Sony Walkman and box of cassettes lying on the side the road in this truck parked in a parking lot on the side of the road.” The front man listened to bands like Men at Work, Toto, Falco, Aha and had every lyric of every song memorized so well he could tap them out in Morse code on the walls of the mine shaft. “To this day, I can still tap out the lyrics to Africa by Toto in Morse code.” says Seeger, “but I’ve learned it’s much better to sing than tap and that’s why I helped form Boom Kinetic — the world’s premiere 80’s pop cover group.”

Zach Gump

The year is 2078 you haven’t been able to sleep for days, so you’re thumbing through a sixth grade history text book. And by thumbing through I mean it’s being beamed via your eyes into your brain. Your robot interrupts and ask if you would like a soda; you reply, “No, you piece of junk. Get outa’ here.” You come to a chapter titled “The First Man to Walk on Mars.” You read and find out that man was Zach Gump. “Big whoopdy doo.” you think, but something catches your brain: Gump was an original member of the 1980’s cover group Boom Kinetic–a group considered, to this day, this best band in history. “My god,” you think, “an original member. And they’re all robots now.” You close the book and go up to the attic. In the bottom of a box marked collectables in the corner you find one of your most valuable possessions– a mint condition, still in box, original members Boom Kinetic action figure set. There he is–Zach Gump with realistic Karate chop motion. You don’t know why, but you open it up. It’s was worth billions, but now just about 500 million (about 23 million in today dollars). You pull out Gump and hold him up in the dingy attic light and say, “To think he is remembered as the first man to walk on Mars. What a shame.” A shimmer of light coming through the dusty window catches his little plastic face and you swear he’s smilling down on you. You bring him down– karate chop, karate chop. “You know what” you think, “I can sleep now.”

Aaron Schauer

Aaron Schauer (1981 - ?) starting playing piano at the age of 11. His progress from beginner to expert/master was so fast the word “prodigy” was often whispered in the quiet corners of the music world. At the age of 13, Schauer was the youngest piano laureate of the State of Oregon–an odd honor, considering he had never been and still hasn’t been there. Two years later, the 15 year old Shower had nowhere to go but down as his life spiraled out of control as gambling debts mounted up and the booze and prescription med addictions were starting to take their toll. Schauer says, “It was a bleak and dark time. I had all this money, all these women, all these Sega Saturn games, but something was missing.” One night after passing out drunk while playing All Right Now at the Elks Lodge in Flippin, Arkansas, Schauer checked into rehab. “It took me 10 years to get clean and get the bookies off my back, but I’m ready to melt faces again.” In 2006, Schauer joined Boom Kinetic as their keyboardist/synthist/vocalist/foggist. Schauer says,”At any given time while I’m playing, there’s no other place I’d rather be right then at that time than playing with Boom Kinetic, because I probably wouldn’t make as much money and the fog gets me a little high.” When asked how he comes up with his unbelievable interpretation of these 80’s classics he says, “I pretty much listen to these songs once, then forget how they went, and come up with something that might sound similar to something I can’t remember. It’s a real art.”

Greg Guillot

Gregory Michael Guillot was born on March 7, 1979 in Brooklyn, New York. He was the second child of Cyborg Prototypes G.P.G #1324534 and S.A.G. #8745837, who had teleported from the Urn-Churl #14 galaxy. At the young age of four, Greg decided that he wanted to be an actor. Soon after, his parents took him on interviews and he was able to land small roles in commercials.

Greg’s popularity soared after he was chosen for the role of Chachi, Fonzi’s cousin, on the hit sitcom, “Happy Days”. Soon after, Greg’s parents moved him to Hollywood and this exposure helped him become a major teen idol in the 1980’s.

After “Happy Days” went off the air in 1984, Greg was given the starring role on the sitcom “Charles in Charge”. He played a college student who was hired to watch over three children. After one season the show was retooled and moved to first-run syndication where it ran successfully from 1987 to 1990.

Oh wait … we forgot to mention that Greg’s left pinky toe is also Scott Baio.

Miguel Gamboa

Little is known about the far away and magical world of Mexico. All we know is that its women are beautiful and its men the best drummist in the galaxy. On rare occasion, it’s wise and secretive government grants foreigners access to the talents of its people–given its people are willing. Boom Kinetic put in one such request and given the Lava’s impeccable reputation around the galaxy, we were granted the talents of the Prince of Tampico–Miguel Gamboa. “I grew up listening to Cindy Lauper and Phil Collins, both natives of Mehiko. I couldn’t pass up this opportunity to play with the best 80’s cover group in the universe.” said Gamboa. The royal drummist has passed on his princely duties to his brother, Paco, during his absence. When asked about living in the U.S. Gamboa says, “I like the rustic-ness of the whole place, how everybody has to work for a living. I might just stay here … ha ha ha ha.”